Sunday, May 26, 2013

How to Effectively Destroy Your Ambitions

Step 1: Apply adhesive to body and face. Lay on bed. Stay.

Step 2: Do not change clothing. Ever.

Step 3: When your body requires the release of fluid and the intake of sustenance, remain hunched and squinty-eyed as you venture from your room.

Step 4: Keep all electrical necessities (aka computer, ipod, phone, etc.) plugged in and near said bed.

Step 5: Never open the curtains. Just don't. Sunlight is toxic and unfriendly and gross.

Step 6: Avoid talking to friends, acquaintances, and family members if possible. They will only remind you that ambitions exist and that you do not have them.




3 comments:

  1. You seem depressed. Is everything okay?

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    Replies
    1. Ah, I'm fine! It's just summer and I'm home with little drive to do anything as per usual ^^.

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